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I knew a guy in college who was very domineering in conversation and he seemed like just a shitty dude by the way he engaged others and seemed to crave this sort of interaction even from Baby Yoda Just Wear The Stupid Mask Wash Your Hands Too Shirt who didn’t want it (like “quiet people”), until I learned that he grew up with very shitty home life and found that he spent his time off-campus taking care of his shitty parents, which is why he was never able to make friends, and why he developed adverse social defense mechanisms. It helps to, as John Green would say, imagine people complexly. Even people who annoy you. A few hours went by and neither of us had said a word to the other. There’s no specific response we expect when we ask that question. At least personally it’s more of a curiosity because as an extrovert, I couldn’t imagine being that quiet.

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What may be signal from one that they’re not having a good time (like being quiet) could just be how another one generally acts when they’re having a great time. For example, though they’re quiet or not initiating conversation, a lot of people will open up if asked. And if they don’t Baby Yoda Just Wear The Stupid Mask. Wash Your Hands Too Shirt like they have to fight to get a word in edgewise. I would describe myself as ambivert or somewhere in the middle, but I really don’t enjoy fighting to get a word in edgewise. Just speak up and tell that person it ain’t a great question, force the change. You want in the world, especially the little things that are in your control. One of the best experiences I ever had with my father in law (we weren’t the best of friends.

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