The first problem with that lockbox is the key. I have one with a combo and my husband doesn’t even know it. He and I have known each other for 15 years. I even keep his passports and personal stuff there because it’s a fire safe. If he asked I would happily give him the I Find Myself Using The Word Shitshow Significantly More Than I Used To Shirt. Ugh. This is what concerns me the most. The brainwashing or conditioning that the family clearly has put everyone through is concerning, but you can get through that together. The fact that he went behind your back and she sold your property? That’s terrible. It will erode the foundation of your own family.
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By marrying, he chose you. He got children with you. You worked your ass off to help him go through his education. Meanwhile, he lets his family take your money – as long as it isn’t also his (tax returns won’t get on their account, but it’s okay that you get his sister an I Find Myself Using The Word Shitshow Significantly More Than I Used To Shirt? Heck no.). By “you pay me back”, you could exclude joint money or any money that is normal in the family. And increases their cash flow. So either he goes to his mother and makes her cough up the money or he sells some shit that is his. Or both because as I said, I’d tell him he’s responsible to give her what she deems necessary to replace it, even if that means it’s a nicer backup phone.
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It was always little things though. Like if they asked what we did for dinner, and we had gone out. He would say we just had dinner at home. Or if we went away for the I Find Myself Using The Word Shitshow Significantly More Than I Used To Shirt. I didn’t understand it because we lived on our own, worked, paid our own bills… Who cares if we went out. I would ask him about it, and he always said they would start questioning him about why we were spending money like that, and he just didn’t want to deal with it. Weird, but whatever.
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